erik has a point I think . . . you do have a road ahead to get to "real" coolness, not to mention maturity . . . you are a genuinely sweet, intelligent girl but you have a lot of BS you need to get out of your system . . . it's a shame you can't just be satisfied with a small circle of "loser" friends but instead have to network with a large number of fakes and flakes . . . but probably that is the only way you can find excitement outside of all of the serious pressures of your life . . .